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Stress In Non-Working Mothers And Its Impact On Mother-Child Relationship

Motherhood is a stage in woman’s life when she gives birth to her child. Motherhood confers upon a woman the responsibility of raising a child. At this stage, the life of a female undergoes a complete change of 360 degrees. This process also changes the way in which she is perceived in society and at her workplace. She is a mother first; along with a wife and daughter of her parents.

Raising a child is a big responsibility for any mother irrespective of whether she is a working professional or not. Nowadays, the females are not restricted to their involvement in just domestic chores or nurturing of their children. Significant portion of females in India are working professionals, who perform a dual role of a mother at home and an employee at their respective organisations.

An important question often persists ‘What is the difference between working and non-working mother’? I would say a lot of it depends upon how society perceives it. The first category is the ‘working class’ who work full time and manage their homes too. No doubt, a working mother enjoys her professional life or career. It might seem easy, but it is not, especially when her kids are small. It becomes increasingly difficult for her to leave kids at home; or a day care. At the same time, work is also important as it provides her financial stability and assistance to the family. In today’s world, when it is necessary for both the parents to work and contribute to the welfare and development of their children, it becomes difficult to balance personal and professional life at times.

Well, there is always another side of the coin. It is about the non-working mothers. The females who are full-time homemakers also find it difficult to manage home and kids. It is often perceived that non-working mothers have a relaxed life, as they spend a significant time at home managing their household work and family; which is totally wrong. In fact, homemakers have an equally vigorous routine like any other working women. Some of them have to sacrifice their well-flourished careers to raise her children efficiently.

Although both the categories have their own set of challenges, I feel the second category women or the ‘non-working class’ face more stress than the first one. It may happen that despite being well qualified, she has to leave her job after becoming mother to raise her kids. It might be a stressful and depressing situation. At times, it might lead to stress, but with time she will learn that kids need full attention of their mother in their initial years and it is sensible for a mother to devote quality time with them. There are many phases in a woman’s life when she is stuck into a kind of dilemma of what to do and how to react to circumstances. It is a highly crucial time when she needs support of her near and dear ones. 

I would say all these situations in her life teach patience and make her strong mentally. It is a fact that a woman plays multiple roles in her family, which in turn affects the health and well-being of her family members. Therefore, it is important for her to be in positive state of mind as it has a direct impact on the behaviour of her children. If a mother is stressed herself, it becomes hard for her to keep her children happy; thereby creating an unfavourable impact on mother-child relationship.

Children tend to learn everything from their mothers first. She is their first friend, philosopher and guide in their life. If the mother is not happy or satisfied, the children can pick up negative attributes which can ruin their future. A mother’s positive attitude towards life is a building block of her children. Therefore, her optimistic behaviour would have a great impact on her children, which aids their physical as well as mental development.

The motherhood definitely changes a woman’s life, but she can become a winner if she surpasses all her fears, angers and emotions.

It is important to keep in mind that life does not end when motherhood starts. But yes, life does change. It is important to embrace this change sportingly. She can always restart her career after her children start going to school. She has full right to pursue her career and dreams, but not at the cost of her children’s upbringing. She has to exercise perseverance and self-control, till all things fall in place.

I would strongly advise to all the non-working mothers to never lose hope and keep patience. It might be difficult, but not impossible to fulfil her dreams. She should give first priority to her children, who need full attention and time during their growing years. She can always start focussing on your career once she is satisfied that her children are on right path and can manage their lives independently. It is advisable for a woman to choose those careers or professions in which she can create a perfect work-life balance.

I also wish to suggest the following points for non –working mothers to overcome stress in their daily life. They are:

A) Create solutions for the peak times:-

Stress generally occurs to mothers in the morning when everyone is ready to go to their respective workplaces. For example: the husband is getting ready for office and kids who are running late for school. As a mother one has to identify the time when she gets more irritable and find a solution to curb the friction during that time. She must plan everything in advance such as the uniform of kids and the lunch to be packed for kids and husband the next morning. It will help her in some way or the other to reduce the pressure in the morning.

B) Take a break :-

Getting stressed is unavoidable at times, but one can get away from stress for a few minutes by taking a break. It helps the person to view the same situation from a new or positive perspective after a pause.

C) Meditation:-

Deep breathing, meditation and prayer are the most powerful tools to overcome stress. It helps the mental relaxation and creates peace within the individual’s body.

D) Exercise together :-

It is a universal fact that exercises not only keep us fit but also a good form of stress-buster also. Therefore, one must take out some time from her busy routine for walking, swimming, running, jumping etc. If possible, the mother should try to do exercises with her kids, which will also instil healthy living habits in them. This is the best strategy for stressful mothers. 

E) Take out time to laugh:-

Stressed people often hold a lot of stress in their faces. Laughs, smiles, giggles can help relieve some of tension. Therefore, the mother should take out some time for her family and kids to laugh with them. It could be done by taking them for an outing; such as for a dinner, picnic or may be on a trip together.

F) Form a social circle :-

It is quite true that non-working mothers are devoted to their families to such an extent that they hardly give time for social needs, or activities. One must not forget that a social circle is very important for a healthy living as it helps to vent out your thoughts by mutual discussions and makes you feel light in this otherwise busy world. It is highly suggested to take out some time from your daily routine to catch up some friends. It generates positive energy and helps in shifting your focus from stressful things; at least for some time.

To sum up, I would say that being optimistic and patience is a key to avoid stress and depression in a mother’s life. With a good support of her family members and belief in herself; she can raise her children into good human beings. She shouldn’t pressurise herself; but take out time for herself from her busy schedule to pursue those activities that she enjoys doing. It will not only create a positive environment but also will improve her family life.

Please note: The opinions expressed in this post are the personal views of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the views of mycity4kids. Any omissions or errors are the author's and mycity4kids does not assume any liability or responsibility for them.